Day 22 - 343 Days to go

Tonight I took advantage of having a built in babysitter in the house and dropped the kids at a movie at Pavilions.  I broke my rule of no movies during the school week (sometimes those rules are meant to be broken).  I rode the shuttle bus for a bit and then walked to Vitamin Cottage and back.  It was such a beautiful walk.  I felt really pleased with myself for using that time for something that would raise my vibration.  I almost felt like I was on a trip to somewhere exotic since this is the last thing I normally do on a week night.  While I was walking, I saw some interesting things and made a list in my head of things I love about downtown Denver.

the free shuttle bus on the 16th St. Mall
Tattered Cover Bookstore
Barnes and Noble Bookstore
Street musicians - even the ones that weren't very good, but were so serious about their music
Classical music playing on the speakers outside McDonald's
the Walgreen's I walked to from our house on California St. to buy a pregnancy test when I was pregnant with Logan
the spot where I ran into Auntie Judy a few days after I moved to Denver
the spot where I ran into Uncle Johnny and he walked me home
the yarn graffiti
the bridge over the train tracks
the bridge over the Platte River
Union Station
the skate park (I can still hear the boys cheering for Logan when he dropped into the deepest bowl)
the city lights
the giant bear peaking into the convention center
the two dancing statues outside the performing arts center
the performing arts center where we have seen Logan perform
Pavilions for movies, food, and shopping
Hotel Monaco where Greg and I stayed for a previous anniversary and then stayed with the kids for fun

I also took a few pictures with my iPhone to share.
                                              



                                                               


Yarn Graffiti Construction Site





Yarn Graffiti




Sunset on the Platte




Window Quotes





Day 21 - 344 Days to go

This morning I was feeling overwhelmed with taking care of four children and missing Greg.  Usually, I would have found a way to escape for a bit by spending too much time on the computer or watching tv or eating bad chocolate (I usually don't feel guilty if I eat really good chocolate).  Today I grabbed Coalie and headed outside to walk.  We walked a brisk two miles and by the time I got back to the house, I felt like a new woman.  I was a lot calmer, more able to focus, and less grumpy.  I even managed to knock out some work and then spent a few hours taking Lexi and Alex to places they haven't been.  We went to a super Target and got things for Logan's upcoming tour with the Colorado Children's Chorale, we went to Chipotle for lunch, and Cold Stone for dessert. 

After driving carpool all over the city, we went to the Brown Palace so I could meet my clients.  This is the place I always want to write up contracts.  Lexi really loved the place and spent an hour researching historical spots and hauntings in Denver.  She has already made plans for tomorrow.



My "assistants" at the Brown Palace



Greg's gift (?) to me of a CA sunset.  He did also send a wonderfully supportive text.



Day 20 - 345 Days to go

I walked a lot today, but I didn't get my intentional walk in.  The first walk I took was around the Mile High stadium.  It was the only thing my nephew Alex asked to do this whole week.  We walked around outside the stadium and then spent some time inside the store.  He was so happy to be there that the staff gave us V.I.P. treatment and let us walk to the stands to get pictures.  It was too bad that Greg had to leave for a trip this morning and Logan and Abby were in school because they would have loved being there too.  Afterwards, we walked at Confluence Park and REI.  My brother Wayne called us in the afternoon to tell us he broke down, but it was good news because that meant he could spend the evening with us.  We picked him up from the truck stop and went to the nursing home to see mom.  She was beyond happy to have both of her children and all of her grandchildren visit.  She told Wayne he hadn't been around for a long time.  Luckily, she doesn't know it's been six years.


We ate dinner at the Spaghetti Factory at Lexi's request.   What a fun kids place.  They ate tons of pasta and even had room for dessert. 

Today is a special day in our family because fourteen years ago today, I was lucky enough to marry the best guy I know.  Some of my friends know this story and one of them thinks it's her favorite thing about me.  Greg and I met at Casa Bonita where we both worked.  He was a manager (I like to kid that he was a diver:-) and I was a waitress.  I had just moved to Denver from Minnesota and thought it would be fun to wait tables on the weekends.  During the week I worked at my social work job.  Eight days after I got here, my second day of work, I met Greg.  I liked him right away and though he was handsome, witty, and confident.  In one of our first serious conversations, we compared the lists that we each had about what we wanted in a relationship and were pleased to see how well they matched.  We knew we would get married almost immediately, but didn't make plans until the following New Year's when our friends from England came to visit.  Greg and I disagree on how this all came about.  What I remember is Mandy, my dearest friend from London, saying that we should plan a wedding for the spring so she and Andy could come back and ski.  We thought it was a good idea so we put them on the plane back to London and headed to Pete's Kitchen to plan our wedding.  We wrote everything down on the back of a napkin.  After Pete's we went to JcPenny at the Villa Italia mall and found my wedding dress.  Greg and I did everything together so it only seemed right that we would shop together.  My dress was one of the four I tried on.  Three months after our napkin plan, we got married. It was a beautiful and simple ceremony in a chapel in Golden.  Our friend Tink Tinker, an Osage spiritual man and Lutheran minister,  performed the service for us and the chapel let my brother smudge (a first for them).  Tink started the ceremony playing a spirit calling song on the drum.  We said the vows that we wrote for each other.  The next day we said goodbye to our family and friends and got on a plane for Isla Mujeras, Mexico. 

I think back to that day and all the people that celebrated with us.  I remember the ones that are no longer here.  In our dining room hangs a painting of the chapel with the border signed by all our loved ones and I think about Nana and Grandpa and Audrey.  By the way, Andy did a wonderful job being a scribe and made sure I have the signatures of all who were there.  I can't believe it's been fourteen years already and I really can't believe how lucky I am to have Greg for my husband.



Anniversary flowers from Greg and wedding "guest book" picture in back



Day 19 - 346 Days to go

Today I got two walks in.  My niece and nephew (Lexi and Alex) are staying with us for the week (Yippee!!) so Greg and I took them to Park Meadows mall today.  We walked around the mall twice and watched Alex ride the escalator up and down at least a dozen times.  The second walk was around the neighborhood tonight for a mile with Lexie.  I got tired watching her do her drills.  It's been almost two years since we've seen them and they both have grown at least a foot.  This morning we went by the nursing home to see my mom.  She used to take care of them a lot when they were little.  It surprised me when she recognized them right away.  She was the happiest I have seen her in ages.  It was a mixture of happiness and awe.  Dementia is such an interesting thing because then I saw a cloud pass over her and she said, "But I have missed so much of them growing up."  It has been 6 years since they have seen each other.  Tomorrow I am going to take all the grandkids at once to see her.  I can't wait:-)

Day 18 - 347 Days to go

I woke up this morning excited for my morning walk.  Coalie and I walked for about 30 minutes through Georgetown.  We walked by a couple of the homes for sale so I could preview them from the outside.  The latest one is a yellow Victorian house with an attached greenhouse.  It looks really charming.  It had snowed during the night and was not very cold.  When we got back to the house, I made pancakes (took me two tries with the altitude) for the kids and then we started cleaning.  We have our first guests coming to stay in Georgetown next weekend.

 On the way out of town, we went back to look at the cuckoo clocks.  Last year we traveled for our anniversary and this year we decided to buy a cuckoo clock.  I thought it might look good in the nook by the stairway.  As soon as we got home, we hung it and I was right.  It's the perfect spot.  Greg said, "our house is finally complete."  I felt the same way.  Is that really all it takes to feel like I'm home? 



I started thinking about being at Nana's again and how it was probably the only place I really felt safe when I was growing up .  The only time it was scary was the night my parents' divorce was final.  My dad got custody of us and took us to Nana's house for the  night.  I woke up to police lights flashing on the ceiling of the kids bedroom and my mom screaming at someone.  I heard the police try to reason with her to leave.  They didn't know what they were up against.  She always looked so sweet and pretty, but was strong and tricky.  I found out later, that it took several policemen to catch her and they were all scratched from the bushes they ran through.  So, besides that night, I did feel safe there.  And the cuckoo clock reminds me of that.

Day 17 - 348 Days to go

Coalie and I walked early this morning as the sun was coming up.  We wandered through the main street which is on 6th St. and looked in the shop windows.  I stopped to see the miniature ice skaters in the International Shoppe window.  I checked out the new window display in Buckskin clothing store. They get so much sun in their tall windows that they change the displays every other day.  I walked by the old jail that used to house man and beast.  Another loop around the Georgetown community school and then back to the house to have breakfast and run comps. 

Later in the afternoon, we all walked to End of the Line for the best chocolate malt and soda's.  The kids went to the park and Greg and I went to the International Shoppe where I have my eye on a cuckoo clock.  They sell the clocks that are handmade from the Black Forest.  I have been wanting to see them on the hour so we waited for a bit to see three clocks chime.  One of the clocks has a man who slams his beer on a table as the bird cuckoos.  The second one has a man chopping wood in front of a charming cottage (I like this because it makes me think of our Georgetown house and Greg chopping wood).  The third has a water wheel that goes round and dancers that circle with music playing after the bird comes out(the fanciest and most expensive).  Cuckoo clocks remind me of being at my Nana's house. Being at Nana's was always the best thing in the world.  I felt happy and cherished.  At night when I would wake up, I would wait to hear the clock so I would know what time it was.  My dad brought the clock back from his time in Korea and my Nana would talk about that with me.  I spent hours sitting on a kitchen stool watching my beautiful classy Nana make amazing things for us to eat and listen to her voice.  Now that Nana is gone, I cherish my time with my aunts and cousins even more.  It's like getting to feel a piece of Nana with each one. Maybe it's the shared feeling we all have for Nana - that she was simply the best.

This evening we walked back to town for dinner at the Raven Hill.  It was warm and cozy in there tonight. Jerry Barlow, a musician, played celtic guitar.  It felt like we were in a pub in England.  This was a first for us - the kids sat at their own table.   We might not be on a romantic retreat for our anniversary this weekend, but we had a nice quiet dinner, we enjoyed great music, and we watched the kids enjoy the music and their own table. 

Day 16 - 349 Days to go

A few minutes ago, we were experiencing mountain home bliss.  The fire was roaring and the kids (Logan,  Abby, and Orion - a friend of Logan's) were playing jenga.  The peace was shattered almost immediately when they decided to build their own castles with the jenga pieces and have wars by throwing other jenga pieces at each other's castles.  I never realized how loud jenga is on hardwood floors.  Luckily, they decided on their own to move the game upstairs. 

On the way to Georgetown, Greg noticed my blah mood and asked what would raise my vibration.  A year ago we went to San Francisco for the weekend to celebrate our 13th anniversary.  I was hoping to plan another weekend, but we couldn't get it together for this weekend.  A year ago my mom still lived in her own house.  Now she is in the hospital for the 4th time since January and I have lost track of how many doctor appointments and procedures she has had.  A year ago we didn't even have the birds we all miss now.  I told him going on a date with him would raise my vibration. Since that wasn't possible, he helped me figure out how to get a walk in. 

We stopped for Chinese take-out right off the highway and Logan, Orion and I walked the rest of the way to the house.  We walked along the creek most off the way.  We showed Orion the ice skating rink and City Park.  We crossed 2 bridges and showed Orion 2 of the 4 houses we looked at when we found our house.  As we walked, it started to snow.  A year ago we didn't have our mountain house. 

Yup, walking and being in Georgetown definitely raise my vibration.

Day 15 - 350 Days to go

I had my whole day planned today.  I had real estate research and paperwork, laundry, and staying put tasks on the list of things to do.  The nursing home called before the kids went to school to let me know that mom has another urinary track infection, her lungs look a little better from the pneumonia, and by the way they are sending her to the ER because she pulled her nephrostomy tube out (ouch!).  So, I spent most of the day in the hospital with mom.  I still managed to walk a bit.  From the ER to radiology where they put a new nephrostomy tube in was .25 miles.  From the ER to the 5th floor where she was admitted was also .25 miles.  I asked the person who pushed her upstairs if he ever wore a pedometer and he said he did once and walked 7 miles during the day.  He said knowing how far he walked made him more tired so he doesn't wear it anymore.  His name was Rhett and yes his mom did love Gone with the Wind.

I picked up Logan from school early because he was feeling lightheaded again, but luckily did not faint today.  He was great company at the hospital.  He was also lots of help when mom refused to move to the table in Radiology.  Just seeing Logan helps her to be more compliant. 

Mom started to get "sun downers" around 7 so we bolted.  It's like the "witching hour" with babies.  She gets more confused and grumpy in the early evening.  I worked for a bit and then texted my friend Sally to see if she wanted to walk.  We walked and talked for 2 miles.  It's always so nice to catch up with her and was a great way to take care of myself after a long day. 

Abby is feeling a bit better.  Tonight when I tucked her in, I asked her why she draped her sleeping bag over the railing of her loft bed.  She said it was so she couldn't see where her birds used to be.  Last night when I tucked her in, she said, "Mommy, thank you for being so supportive about my birds."

Day 14 - 351 Days to go

I walked three times today.  The first time was early in the morning in Georgetown.  Coalie and I walked to the creek and jogged back to the house for the drive into Denver.  The second walk was with my friend Loralee.  We walked about a mile and then had to back track to find Loralee's knitting bag (luckily the wind did not blow it away).  The third and quickest (but felt like the longest) walk of all was into the school when I got a call that Logan had fainted.  Luckily, his doctor was also walking into the school so we got him checked out immediately.   We don't really know why he fainted, but are watching him closely.  Evidently, people faint when they are dehydrated, getting sick, hungry, or have an irregular heart rate none of which Logan seems to have.  It's almost five hours later and he seems fine except for a slight headache where his head hit the desk. 

When Logan was born, I remember thinking, "Parenting is definitely not for the faint of heart."  I felt overpowered by love and protection for him.  My friend Molly told me, "Giving birth is like falling in love times a thousand."  Boy, was she right.  My friend Kay, who had already raised a beautiful young woman told me, "Just remember, you can't take too much blame or too much credit."  That was a relief.

The protection feeling kicked in on the drive home from the hospital.  We labored over making sure that Logan had nursed enough before we left, that the carseat was installed properly, that he was strapped in correctly, that he was warm enough, and that we were driving carefully enough.  At the first stoplight, it hit me hard that when my brother and I were very small, my mom would leave us in the car while she went into a bar to drink.  I wasn't angry at her...anymore.  I just couldn't imagine how much pain she must have been in to leave her children like that.  I knew I would make mistakes, but luckily that would not be one of them.

Day 13 - 352 days to go

We had an early morning dental appointment so we missed walking to school again. On the way to school we drove by the vet so we stopped to pick up Tweety and Lola. Lola died late yesterday afternoon. Abby was so sad she cried herself to sleep, cried during her sleep, and cried when she woke up. I felt so bad that I cried when I moved the cage out of Abby's room and moved things around so it would feel nice and new.

I snuck a quick walk in this afternoon. I parked at the kids' school and previewed a couple of houses nearby and then walked on the 7th Avenue parkway. It was so windy today I felt like I couldn't catch my breath. I always think about the pioneer people who supposedly went crazy when it was windy for days on end. I can relate. Wind makes it hard for me to feel grounded -like my energy is being swirled around.

After school we had the funeral for Tweety and Lola. We buried them by the bird bath in our back yard. We took turns saying something about the birds. Abby said it was funny how they would try to read with daddy when he read to her at bedtime. Logan said he will miss how annoying they were (I guess I can't deny any longer that Logan is almost a teenager). Greg said he was glad the birds were such good friends to Abby. I said that I will miss them singing to the Rodrigo y Gabriela Tamacun song (their favorite song). We each put a handful of dirt on the grave and then Abby, with tears running down her cheeks, finished burying them.

Day 12 - 353 Days to go

Abby and I just got back from a walk.  We had a slow, sweet walk to the dollar store to get the graham crackers she has been craving since yesterday.  We held hands and she sang,

"Spring is here said the bumble bee
how do you know said the old oak tree
I just heard a daffodil
singing to the rosemary on the hill."

This morning I went into Abby's room as usual.  I said, "Good morning Sweetie Bird," which reminded us to uncover her two parakeets.  Abby calls her birds her little friends and every morning she says, "good morning birdies."  Unfortunately, Tweety Bird was dead and Lola wouldn't leave his side.  We decided to let Abby stay home from school and she soon noticed Lola fading.  We took her to the vet and she is hanging in there for now.  We were very worried it was carbon monoxide poisoning so Greg came home from work to meet Xcel.  Luckily, no carbon monoxide leaks.  The birds caught some kind of infection that was fast acting.  The vet said it could be from their food or treats...

Today was also Audrey's funeral.  It was a beautiful service.  Her 16 year old granddaughter gave the eulogy.  Audrey cherished her family.  Her granddaughter said she wasn't surprised to hear that she died of an enlarged heart as she was someone that loved so well.  She also loved birds.  I told Abby that I was sure Audrey would look after her Tweety Bird.

Day 11 - 354 Days to go

I walked today with my friend, Gretchen.  We walked through two of my favorite neighborhoods - Denver Country Club and Cheeseman Park catching up on our lives and families.  Gretchen is one of the people in this world that I really admire.  She is an amazing wife and mother to five children and is a wonderful friend.  Her volunteer experience is impressive and now she has started a website called MidChix www.midchix.com.  If you are a woman over 40, check it out. 

I think there is a reason Sunday is supposed to be a day of rest.  Greg worked on the laundry room (this is week 3 of this project) so I decided to work in the garage.  Half of our garage is filled with my mom's things from her house.  They have been there since last summer when we moved her to a nursing home.  I sorted through 3 boxes quickly and then started on the fourth box.  It was full of papers, report cards, baby shoes, pictures, and letters.  I found a couple of letters my mom wrote to my dad in 1956 (I was born in 1964).  I found every letter and postcard I wrote to my mom when I lived in Switzerland, England, and Wales.  I found pictures of my cousin Audrey whose funeral is tomorrow.  I found a military picture of my Uncle Eddie who died soon after I was born.  Finding all that stuff took me almost two hours and most of my energy.  Greg asked me what I hope to find by going through the boxes.  I told him I want to find proof of my mom's love for me.  He said, "you already know that," and he is right.  Still, sorting through her lifes' belonging feels like the right thing to do.  All day I had this overwhelming desire to call her and talk to her.  I started thinking back to the last time I could call her.  It was before she started taking care of my Grandpa in 1997.  We still chatted, but taking care of Grandpa took all of her time and energy and eventually health.  In 2003, my mom moved Grandpa back to the reservation.  When she came back, she was a different person.  I thought she was upset about moving Grandpa, but now I realize that she was never the same after that and I wonder if she had a stroke. 

It's great that she lives so close and I can see her as much as possible.  I feel very thankful that the dementia is not so bad yet; that she still knows who I am and is happy to see me.  Every day I see her, spend time with her, hug her, I appreciate that time.   Still, I can't help but miss my mom.

Day 10 - 355 Days to go

We had a family walk to Adagio this morning for coffee and breakfast.  We were going to hang out in Turtle Park, but it's under construction.  Every time I go by Turtle Park, I remember bringing my babies there.  Abby wanted to swing and giggle the entire time and Logan would make friends with the other kids.  We bought our house in Park Hill in 2002, the same year Abby was born.  With the second child, we decided we needed more space and I was determined to live in Park Hill.  It was the one place I lived when I was a child that I really loved (before life with my family got really crazy).  In the early 70's, we lived off of 16th and Jasmine.  My parents bought the house for $16,500 and sold it a few years later for $36,000.  I went to kindergarten at Montview elementary (my favorite memory is taking my baby brother to school for show and tell - he was a big hit). 

In 2002, the house prices in Park Hill were more expensive than I could imagine for myself.  I would go for walks with my friend Rebecca (who was a realtor) and we would dream about owning one of the big houses on 17th Avenue Parkway.  I even made a heart's desire list for a house:

Park Hill neighborhood
3 Bedrooms
2 Bathrooms
Fireplace
Hardwood Floors
Garage
At least 2000 square feet
$350,000 or less

I was searching online one day and saw a new listing for a house on Colorado Boulevard (which is a 6 lane street).  I thought there was no way I would want to live on that street, but the first words I saw on the description were, "QUIET INSIDE."  I called Rebecca and asked her to take me through it.  Greg was at the airport heading to Philadelphia on a business trip, but I called him from the alley before I went into the house.  The fence in the backyard was a beautiful brick wall.  I told him I found our house.  Two steps inside the front door, I knew I was home.  There was (is) a huge stone fireplace in the living room that caught my attention and a circular stairway upstairs.  This was the description of the house:

4 Bedrooms plus a bonus room in the basement
4 Bathrooms
3 Fireplaces (living room, master bedroom and family room)
Hardwood Floors
2 car garage
Office
Family Room in the basement
3600 Square feet
Views of city skyline, City Park Golf course, and mountains
List price: $350,000

I had used a list before to make my dream a realty (I met Greg after a list I made - more on that story another day), but I was really amazed that it worked so well.   I like to joke that Greg always wanted to live on a golf course - he just didn't specify that he didn't want 6 lanes of traffic in between. 

The same year we found our house, my friends Peter and Sue and I met once a week for 9 weeks to discuss the book Your Heart's Desire: Instructions for Creating the Life you Really Want by Sonia Choquette.  I used Sonia's principles for finding our house.  Sonia has a saying, "This or better, so be it" which was so true with our house.  I have continued to use these principles in lots of ways in my life and I use these principles when working with my clients.  When people ask me what kind of real estate I do, I tell them, heart's desire real estate.

This or better, so be it.

Day 9 - 356 Days to go

It was a gorgeous day for a walk.  The kids had a half day so I parked at my mom's nursing home (6 blocks from the school) and walked to pick them up.  We walked slowly back to the nursing home together enjoying the sun and talking about our mornings.  After a nice visit with Grandma, we went home and had a picnic on a blanket in the back yard (Abby's brilliant idea).  Our picnic included chicken salad, Gruyere cheese, a baguette, an orange, an apple, and a piece of dark chocolate with cherries and almonds for dessert.  Yummy.

Today I got so busy staying put, I almost forgot to blog (I was only distracted by two houses today).  I wandered around the Container Store this morning looking for things for the laundry room (which may be done this week...) and our dressing room.  Tonight Greg and I came up with a solution for a folding table/sewing area from things we already have.  I'll post pictures of the before and after if/when it is complete.   My favorite way to decorate is to look around the house and figure out things we have that can be used in a different way.

Speaking of different uses for furniture...I have a trunk that my Grandpa Dumont made for me from scrap lumber he found in an alley.  He was the ultimate recycler building furniture and sheds from found objects.  My mom turned one of the sheds into a summer cottage where she stayed when she visited.  I have used the trunk for lots of things, but its current use is our household filing cabinet.  I needed another piece of furniture for the office that I could use for my client files, storage, etc. so I went out searching this week for something interesting.  A filing cabinet just seemed too boring.  I went to Garage Antiques on 8th Avenue and saw an old lingerie cabinet for a great price.  It has a sliding door with little cubbies and 4 small drawers below.  Perfect for completed transactions that I may need to access, current transactions, and office supplies.  Anyway, the funniest part is when the owner went out to my car to measure to make sure I could fit the cabinet.  She saw two pictures that I was taking to the thrift store and offered me $30 for them.   What a great way to shop:-)

Day 8 - 357 Days to go

Today Logan and I walked to school with his friend.  Even though it was fun watching the boys longboarding and ripsticking, I was having a hard time enjoying the walk.  I was thinking, what in the world did I commit myself to - a whole year of walking and blogging - am I crazy?  I was thinking how could I continue spending so much time walking when I have so many things to do.  The funny thing is, it doesn't seem like I have less time.  I managed to accomplish some things today that I had really put off.  I delivered taxes to the accountant, picked up a check from work, went to the bank, previewed a house, and researched some properties for a client.

Later in the day, I went with my mom to a doctor appointment.  While we were out, the nursing home moved her to another floor.  She has dementia so doesn't understand why she doesn't feel comfortable in the new space.  We were sitting in her room when I heard my friend, Trina.  She is the social worker for that floor and was with my mom's friend Billy.  Billy also moved to another floor today and was having a very hard time with it.  We wheeled Billy into mom's room and they were instantly happy.  They told us all that they were very good friends and they each thought the other person was the sweetest person ever.   I agree with them.

I love running into Billy.  The first time I met him he told me about his three rules for living a good life:

1.  Never complain
2.  Never speak badly about another
3.  Treat everyone with love

Day 7 - 358 Days to go

What a day.  First of all, I got Abby to scooter with us to school today (she didn't even complain - this is indeed a miracle).  While we were walking, I told them about my cousin Audrey.  I found out last night that she died on Saturday.  I told them about how she was the cousin I looked up to and who was always so sweet to me.  I also told them I haven't seen her in years because she had a drinking problem and it felt safer.  I started crying (Logan seemed stunned and Abby managed to hold my hand and scooter at the same time) and said I wonder if she knew I loved her or if she felt judged by me.  Choosing not to see someone because of their lifestyle does feel judgmental.  At that moment, I realized it hurts a lot more to be doing the judging rather than being judged.  I told them every time we look at one of our friends or loved ones and think poorly of them because of a choice they make, we are judging them.  Abby became very philosophical and said because Audrey was in heaven of course she knew I loved her and someday I would see her again and be able to tell her myself. 

So far it seems that walking has lifted my spirits, has helped me feel the feelings, and has given me amazing time with my family.

I spent the morning with my favorite uncle, Audrey's dad, and her family.  I spent the afternoon touring homes in Denver Country Club.  I spent the evening at a meeting for Logan's choir.  Life goes on. 

I'm still trying to practice staying put, but the first two homes of my tour today were so tempting.  I immediately sent Greg a text.

My text to Greg:  First house is mine.
Greg's reply text: I'm sorry this is an automated response from your husbands iPhone.  You are to practice "staying put" which would not involve moving to the country club.  Your husband did not receive your original message but if you feel the need you may try to resend it.  It probably won't make it but it may help with the urge.
Me: Can u hear the waterfall?  The second is even better.
Greg:  Sorry your text could not be completed.  Please try again when you get to the 400K price range.

Day 6 - 359 days to go

Logan and I walked to school again today so I got two miles in.  After drop off, my friend Robin and I previewed a great house near the school.  It was very tempting as it had the cutest staging I have ever seen.  It was an easy morning to count my blessings spending time with my son, spending time with a good friend, and seeing a beautiful space.

When I got home, I practiced staying put by using a flylady http://www.flylady.net/ trick.  I set the timer for 15 minutes and decluttered office files as quickly as I could.  The timer went off and I reset it for another 15 minutes.  I purged a bunch of old files and found the last few things I needed for taxes.  I love flylady.  She has helped so many people.  Decluttering definitely cheers me up.

In our family, we refer to things as either raising or lowering our vibrations.  One day I made a whole list of things that raised my vibrations and I carry it with me in my purse.

Things that raise my vibration:
Getting up early by myself
Going for walks
Riding my bike (which is a cute pink cruiser)
Seeing houses
Decorating
Staging
Talulah Jones
Hanging out with Greg
Spending time with the kids
Having a cup of coffee with a friend
Traveling
Antiquing
Thrifting
Baking
Going to a movie
Going to a bookstore or beautiful shop
Making things with my hands
Eating a delicious and healthy meal
Looking at decorating books/magazines
Writing
Cleaning the house
Watching decorating or inspiring shows
Reading

Things that lower my vibration:
Eating junk food
Having a messy house
Reading for too long
Feeling overwhelmed/disorganized
Watching too much t.v

On the bottom of my lists, I have a reminder to find a high vibration activity or thought when I feel low.  It makes me remember a day when Abby said her vibration was low.  When I asked her what would raise it, she said,"Donuts!"  That's my girl:-)

Day 5 - 360 days to go

Today was one of those days where I felt completely scattered.  I felt like I was chasing the things I had to do all day today.  It probably had something to do with the time change and feeling like I started the morning late.  I did get a long walk in this morning to and from school with Logan (four miles).  Why is it always so easy to think about what I don't accomplish in a day rather than what I do accomplish?

The other overwhelming feeling today was a feeling of restlessness.  One of my job hazards is that I always want to move.   To be honest, I have had this feeling since before I had the real estate job.  I love moving into a new house and better yet a new city.  There is so much to see and discover and it seems so exciting - for a few months anyway.  I need to figure out how to stay in the same place and be comfortable with that.  I read a book last summer called When Wanderer's Cease to Roam: A Traveler's Journal of Staying Put by Vivian Swift.  It's a beautiful book with the author's drawings and paintings.  She makes staying put seem so nice. 

I'm sure our never ending house projects contribute to the restlessness somewhat.  We have been working on making our laundry room more functional and it seems like it has taken forever.  The house is dustier than normal and the dirty clothes are piling up.  Soon, it will be finished and functional and fun....I hope. 

Logan and I had a chilly walk this morning.  It took ages for me to warm up afterwards.  We left late this morning and had to book it to school.  He just barely made it in time.  He led the conversations today and started out talking about lying.  He said his teacher talked to the class last week about lying and how it really only hurts the person who is lying.  She told them she has known most of them since first grade and some even in kindergarten so why would they think she wouldn't know them well enough to know when they are lying.  I told Logan again (I've been telling our children the same thing for years) that lying even once can really hurt your loved one's ability to trust you.  We talked about what it means to have integrity and that it is so much easier to live that way.  His teacher also said it is much easier to die at the end of your life knowing you haven't lied to people so then Logan wanted to talk about heaven and hell.  It was so interesting to let Logan lead this conversation.  He wondered if there really is a hell and I told him that I thought hell for me would be living a life of treating people badly and not having integrity. 

Tomorrow on my walk I am going to focus on the blessings in my life (like having a spiritual son) and in staying put.  Or moving if I find the perfect house - I know it's out there:-)

Day 4 - 361 Days to go

Today we woke up to a winter wonderland in Georgetown.  We walked to our favorite breakfast spot - The Happy Cooker - which is only about a two minute walk.  It was the perfect morning - trees dusted with snow and warm enough that we could just wear our vests.  At breakfast we saw our favorite waitress and met a nice couple from Grand Rapids that want to move to Colorado.  I gave them my card in the hopes that we will meet again so I can help them with their dream move.

After breakfast, we went on a family walk.  I'm thinking I named the blog the wrong name because walking has really been a family event and an enormous blessing.  Today there were lots of snowball fights and laughter on our walk.  I wore my cute pink uggs and slipped twice.  Greg and I came up with a little song (really it was me, but he wants credit for coming up with 2 of the key words) sung to the tune of, "These boots are made for walking."

     These uggs aren't made for walking
     They're way too slip-per-y
     Every time I wear them
     I fall down on my knee

Greg and Abby peeled off halfway through the walk so Logan and I carried on.  I taught him more about architecture and symmetry and he listened attentively.  If that isn't enough of a gift from a twelve year old boy, I don't know what is:-)

Day 3 - 362 Days to go

Somehow I managed to talk Abby into walking to the library with me this morning (to be honest I bribed her by offering to take her shoe shopping). She rode her scooter which made for a very fast walk. It must have been a good pace for Coalie because he was very well behaved (miracles never cease). I thought about how walking is such a good way to tune into my environment. As much I as I like to run, walking is a great pace to really notice what's around me. Today I noticed there were tons more cars in the neighborhood including a four car accident. I had forgotten there was major construction, but seeing the traffic jams helped me avoid getting stuck in it later when we drove to the mall for shoes.

While we walked, Abby and I talked about why it's important to me to walk. I told her about my sadatude and together we decided walking would help me get a gladitude (my iPad keeps trying to turn gladitude into blackbird...)

Since our walk to the library was only a mile, I wanted to get a second walk in today. Abby and I met Greg and Logan in the mountains and Greg and Coalie came with me for my evening walk. Walking in Georgetown is so much fun (except for the mountain lion risk). There are so many cute houses and shops to see and the views are incredible. Tonight the stars were really bright. We walked by a new house for sale on Rose St. It's a big Victorian house with a wrap around porch. I have noticed it for awhile since I covet the beautiful and huge side yard. I can't wait to look at it. We walked a mile and thankfully did not meet a mountain lion tonight.

On somewhat of a side note, I had tea with my dear friends today at the brown palace. We have been friends since our children were babies and still call our group the baby group. Today we got together for our friend who has cancer and to offer our support to her. She is an amazing woman who has the best attitude about life. It was so wonderful to see everyone and to reconnect. I left in awe of our connections and the things we have all experienced in the last few years. I also left with promises of walks to come. I can't wait:-)

Day 2 - 363 Days to go

All in all, I think the walk yesterday did help with my mood.  Besides a small headache and much needed catnap (with all my kitties), I really felt pretty good.  I made a healthy dinner for my family and went out and showed houses.  I was also able to wake up at 5:30 today again without an alarm. 

The walk today took a little more finagling.  I was supposed to drive carpool (thank you husband for taking that on) and had a coffee date scheduled with my sweetie after drop off.  I figured I would just walk to school today and meet Greg at school for our coffee date.  It's funny how two miles seemed so short and to think on Wednesday or most of the days this past year I didn't walk at all. 

Once carpool was taken care of, I had to figure out what to wear that would be comfy for walking and nice for our coffee date and business enough to show houses after coffee.  Any of my friends that have seen me in the last three years know my knee high black Clark boots that I wear almost every day so that is what I put on.  I have to say they weren't the comfiest shoes for walking, but they worked fine.  I would love ideas of cute and comfy walking shoes that can multitask.

I did bring Coalie again today (he had to stay in the car for the coffee date) and he was better behaved than yesterday.  Do you think this might make him a better dog?  I can only dream.

Logan is so excited about walking with me.  When I talked to Abby again about the plan to walk every day, she looked horrified.  I'm not sure when I will get her to walk with me...I am going to try tomorrow since Logan and Greg will be skiing.  Wish me luck. 

The two miles with Logan was definitely worth the time and energy.  I have probably had more time with him in the last two days than I have had in the last month or maybe even since Abby was born. LOL  This morning we left our house and cut across the golf course and then City Park.  Logan got a picture of the view, but included the water jet area while he dreamed about summer.  It's the cement pad that looks like an airstrip.  We also got a picture of us with the wind blowing like crazy (my hair doesn't usually look like that:-).  We had an interesting talk about how the little things in life are sometimes the things that make a huge difference.  We thought about our walks and the things that might happen for us - we may meet new friends, see something different, make decisions that impact our life...Five blocks from school we stopped to look at a Victorian triplex for sale.  While we were contemplating what it would look like if it were fixed up, we heard Logan's name.  One of his classmates saw us from her attic bedroom window in the house next door.  She was out the door within a minute and finished the walk with us.  Sometimes we will meet old friends on our walks too.

Reading everyone's wonderful comments yesterday were probably the biggest energy lift of all - thank you dear friends!

Day 1 of my Walk-a-blog experiment (364 days to go)

After sitting on the sofa for two nights in a row and going to bed very early and still waking up exhausted, I decided something has got to change.  I have been feeling awful lately - sluggish, sad, overwhelmed, and frumpy.  I kept thinking about the saying that insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results and realized that I needed to do something different.  I went to my anti-frumpy book remedy French Women Don't Get Fat by Mireille Guiliano and started reading.  It made me remember how good I felt the last time I went to Paris.  I ate great food and walked everywhere.  I started thinking about all that walking could do for me and I made a list:

Helps with mood
Good way to get Vitamin D
Good way to save on gas
Helps me to be in better shape
Increases energy
Good way to spend time with the children
Sets a good example for our children

So, I started scheming about walking every day for a year for at least 15 minutes per walk, blogging, getting rid of my sadatude (sad attitude), and changing my life :-).  Our 12 year old son Logan got on board (pun intended-see below) too and we decided to walk to school (2 miles) and even see Grandma on the way if we had time.  Our 8 year old daughter Abby was not so keen.  That may take awhile...

This morning I jumped out of bed at 5:30 without an alarm (maybe it's working already) to prepare for my walk.  This is what I decided I needed on my first walk:

My new skinny jeans that are the perfect gray and go with
My new t-shirt that says, "Save the earth, it's the only planet with cupcakes"
My cute black puma shoes with the pink soles
Black sweatshirt that I could tie around my waist if it got too hot
A small purse that I could wear cross ways - I picked my green 9 west purse that I bought at a thrift store and sewed purple felted flowers to
A smaller wallet with id, money and euros (that have been in this wallet since my last trip to Paris in 2004)
Burt's bees tinted lip moisturizer
Business cards because you never know when I might meet someone who is looking for their dream house
My iPhone so I can take pictures of my walk
Scratched prada sunglasses (luckily the scratch does not interfere with vision) that I bought at a consignment shop in Philly
My cute notepad from Talulah Jones http://www.talulahonline.com/ with a pink calligraphy pen
My light blue with green heart felted "greensleeve" in case I stop for a coffee at the Starbucks along the way
Our anxiety ridden dog Coalie (I will probably regret this one...)
A water bottle to go in Logan's backpack
Oh ya, last but definitely not least - Logan who decided to ride his long board

As with most things, the walk wasn't all I had hoped it would be.  It was chillier (45 degrees) than I thought so I had to wear my vest.  On the way home, I got really hot, but couldn't tie the vest around my waist.  Coalie was very annoying - especially when we stopped at the nursing home to visit my mom and when he almost took my arm off chasing the geese, and when he barked so loud in the nursing home atrium all 6 floors could hear him.  I got a blister on my left heel.  And most frustrating of all, my iPhone does not have enough disk space for me to take the awesome picture in City Park of the lake, pavilion, city skyline, and mountain views. 

Then again, I did have an unexpected 30 minutes with Logan.  He told me all about his scary dream last night and his hopes for the medieval games that he will attend for 6th grade.  I do feel like I accomplished quite a bit just by walking 4 miles today.  The views were really quite amazing from City Park (I will show you another day) .  I had a really nice visit with my mom in which we remembered our favorite dog we used to have and her wonderful dog training skills.  I also ran into the nurse and social worker at the nursing home which saved me having to call them later to discuss mom's pneumonia and her upcoming move to another floor.  And best of all, Coalie is so tired he's not whiny and anxious at all.